I am guilty of this….or at least I was. Statistics exist for every conceivable act in our life. Look at the old Ben Stiller movie “Along Comes Polly.” In this movie he plays an insurance actuary and know the statistical probability of someone dying from pretty much every type of death.
There are stats for sports; there are stats on motor vehicle accidents; there are stats on popularity of baby names and people’s favorite foods, et al. You get my drift. We keep stats of everything.
But when do we look up these stats? It seems we only do so when we are interested in knowing the answer for something. Our inherent inquisitive nature tends to be latent for most things until something spurs it into motion. Then we look it up and our curiosity is stated.
This modus operandi tends to make since. If we looked up the stat for every conceivable fact on the planet, we would literally never leave the Internet. We already have a screen addiction for Pete’s Sake. We would fall into a quagmire of inefficient productivity vis-a-vis our jobs and family time.
That being said, it seems like when it comes to some of the biggest investments in our life it would behoove us to look up stats. For example, many people look up the sex offender’s list prior to moving into a neighborhood. Or perhaps the rating of their kid’s prospective school or even reviews on Amazon or Yelp for apparel and foods.
Doesn’t It Need To Be Asked?
But the questions needs to be asked. Why don’t we ever look at the stats for the biggest investment in a man’s life…marriage. There is no institution on the planet that can elevate, buoy, or destroy a man more than the “sacrament” of matrimony. Perhaps prison is worse and no doubt the two are tied together by false allegations that may throw you in prison; nevertheless, marriage is fraught with problems.
We have several episodes here at The Awakened Man podcast demonstrating this assertion. In the court milieu where a woman may take half your assets and garner child support and alimony by divorcing YOU with no legitimate pretext or reason, it seems smart to look up the chances. Seriously, the woman can cheat on you, steal money from you in the marriage, and false allege you and STILL get the aforementioned. Wake up!
Let’s look at some stats. 75% of divorces are initiated by women; 90% if they are college educated. 50% of 1st marriages end in divorce; 70% of 2nd marriages; 78% of 3rd marriage and so forth.
So doesn’t it make sense that a divorced men should look up and ruminate over the fact that statistically his 2nd divorce has a 70% of ending, and more likely than not she will initiate it and financially benefit from it. Why don’t most men just Google “What percentage of 2nd marriages end in divorce?” We google so many other extremely irrelevant and frivolous things throughout the day, why not this exceedingly important query?
In most cases, the men hasn’t even cogitated over the notion that this marriage will end. He thinks he found “true love” again and will have a blissful Disney-eque ending. He thinks the 1st wife was the exception and that this new love is the norm for future domestic tranquility and euphoria. Well, if that were true, then why do so many 2nd marriages end in disaster?
He doesn’t know this nor does he want to even ponder this stat. Just approach a divorce who is planning to remarry this 70% stat. He will ejaculate out some platitudes about NAWAL Unicorns nonesense and then later project out and endeavor to shame you with such invectives as “You don’t know her!” “Who hurt you.” “You are bitter and cynical and alike.”
You aren’t necessarily telling him this 2nd marriage will certainly end in disaster. You are solely bringing up the stat, but he doesn’t want to hear it. He wants to kills the messenger.
The “Rational” Male
Men, we take pride in being so rational and logical when it comes to other facets of our lives. No doubt, when it comes to finance many men spend hours deliberating over the best way to spend or save their assets, but when it comes to love we are so capricious with it. And we fail to see how this impulsive, quixotic view of love is inherently tied to our assets. #irony.
Men, if you are foolish enough to marry or marry again, look up the stats. Knowledge is power. And really inhale the stats.
Would you get on a plane that has a 70% chance of crashing?